The day I cleaned up a 1-room flat

Tong and I decided to do some volunteer work last Saturday. We started off the day by being late - reached there at 10.30am when we were supposed to gather at 8am. Oh well, Saturdays are for sleeping in late after slogging throughout the week right? So when we finally arrived, we were tasked to clean up the kitchen of this 1-room flat owned by an elderly old man, 88 years old to be exact.

Wanted to throw up when I was cleaning the kitchen. Never seen so much grime, dirt and whatever you can or cannot think of. We had to wash up the whole place with no gloves and footwear. Whatever we washed off the ceiling and walls came right down, and we stepped all over the grease, grime, dirt and soapwater. Had to force myself not to think of it and kept my head up towards the ceiling where I was literally "painting" it with Jif.

The other volunteer, a young chap from China (goodness knows how he came to know about this volunteer project). Obviously he doesn't have much experience with cleaning ceilings whatsoever. He used a coconut husk brush and scrubbed the ceiling with all his might. Think he must have felt really tired cos' the soapwater would always run down his arms whenever he lifted it up towards the ceiling. Poor chap. Told him to use an almost-dry green pad and apply it with Jif liberally but he didn't listen. Oh well...

After cleaning up the kitchen, we had to paint the walls. Tong did the kitchen while I covered the living room. Phew! Painting's no easy task either. At least I was away from the kitchen and away from the sight of it all, that I managed to eat 2 small pcs of lemon chicken. Not much of an appetite after witnessing all the stuff we dug out or removed.

Alas! My rather-new pair of dri-fit shorts was quite ruined after painting. That's a humble lesson to learn - leave your branded sportswear at home when you want to do volunteer work like cleaning up and painting, especially painting!

We had this leader who was in charge of the unit we're cleaning up and painting. Can't remember his name. He was quite a pain in the ass. Besides making remarks to make himself seem important, he also helped everybody out with lots of his eye power. If we weren't doing volunteer work, I'll shove the mop down his throat. Joey was removing the fluorescent lights from the holders and cleaning them, and she asked the leader to do the same. He, obviously don't know how to, but refused to ask, nearly dropped the tube and murder us.

Another highlight was when we were moving this portable cooking stove back to the kitchen when we realised that there was a pair of huge cockroaches inside. I refused to touch it, so he was given the high task to use his arm power this time to remove the cockroaches. He, intelligently, moved to the window, and tried removing the cockroaches by dangling and shaking the stove OUTSIDE the window?!?! Think he can't wait to get someone killed by his not-so-intelligent acts. I couldn't help it but just reminded him that the person who happened to walked past downstairs must by damn sway if he kenna the stove or a pair of loving cockroaches flying down on him from the sky.

The leader didn't stop there. He ended the day on a high note - by mopping the floor and instructing the China chap to do the same - with terpentine. Tong made a joke out of it and said that the worst luck or fate will be that of the ah pek's if he comes home and drops his cigarette on the floor. We had to clean up the bloody floor, not only of paint we dripped but also the bloody terpentine.

At the end of the day, the ah pek came back and was very happy with the touch-ups to his home. Nevermind the finishing paint with patches of white paint in between, or the ceiling with the artistic strokes of where the Jif reached (or didn't reach), or the misplacement of his belongings (but I think he can't remember what he owns amongst his piles of junk anyway), he was happy and that's good enough. Lessons learnt at the end of the day were - get married and have kids, and make sure that they don't dump you at old age; save a fortune, so that you can select the best maid who won't murder you before you live out your life; save a fortune enough to live to your death at an old folks' home or hospice; or what I think is the most profitable, die in a car accident so that you can leave a fortune for your family and you get die (hopefully) instantly. Can't wait to get myself killed in an accident. Yippee.